Well, well, well… here we are again. Another January, another Jets season that makes you question why you even bother watching football. But this year? This year was different. This wasn’t just your run-of-the-mill Jets disaster—oh no, this was a masterpiece of incompetence, a symphony of suffering, a record-breaking trainwreck that will be studied by future generations as the gold standard of organizational failure. I’ve watched this franchise disappoint me for years, but the 2025 season? It was pathetic. We didn’t just lose games; we rewrote the history books in the most embarrassing ways imaginable.
Zero Interceptions All Season Long
The Jets became the first team to never record an interception in a season since 1933—the year interceptions were first officially recorded. That’s right, folks. Ninety-two years of NFL football, and we’re the first team to accomplish this undesirable feat. Not a single pick. Not one. Opposing quarterbacks threw for 3,849 yards, 36 touchdowns, and zero interceptions against us. Incredible.
Dead Last in Everything That Matters
The Jets ranked 32nd in point differential, turnover differential, and yard differential. Let me repeat that—we finished dead last in all three categories. No team has ever finished 32nd in all three in the same season. We didn’t just lose; we got obliterated in every measurable way possible.
Garrett Wilson Led the Team… From the Injury List
Garrett Wilson finished the season with 395 receiving yards. He led the team in receiving yards despite not playing since October 12th. Think about that for a second. Our best receiver went down in Week 6, and no one—literally no one—could surpass his 395 yards the rest of the season. That’s how bad this offense was.
Historic Five-Game Blowout Losing Streak
The Jets became the first team ever to lose five straight games by 23+ points in a single season. We didn’t just lose these games—we got demolished, embarrassed, and sent home crying. The point differential during this stretch was -134 points, averaging a 26.8-point loss per game. I am in utter disbelief at how horrific this season was and cannot imagine any potential recovery in the near future.
So What’s Next? Let Me Paint You a Picture of Our Inevitable Future…
The Jets have four picks within the top 44 overall selections—picks No. 2, 15, 33, and 44 overall. We will not trade any of these picks, because that would require actual competent decision-making. It is blatantly obvious that the Jets will select a new quarterback with the second overall pick. History will, in fact, repeat itself—similar to 2018 and 2021 when we drafted Sam Darnold and Zach Wilson.
Dante Moore or Fernando Mendoza—whichever unfortunate soul we select—will have a horrible start to their career with the Jets, only to leave and find success with a different franchise. It’s the Jets way. We’re essentially a quarterback development program for other NFL teams. You’re welcome, league.
We will most likely choose a defensive player with the 15th overall pick—ideally a middle linebacker or defensive back who can make an immediate impact. (He will suck, by the way. That’s a guarantee.) Now here’s where it gets even better. The Jets will carry $75 million in dead cap space into 2026, which is the second-highest in the entire NFL. Dead money. Money we’re paying players to NOT play for us. Beautiful.
There will be no veteran acquisitions worth mentioning. I imagine we’ll sign Trey Hendrickson and massively overpay him, wasting most of our remaining cap space. We’ll also probably bring in players like Alec Pierce or John Franklin-Myers—and trust me, when JFM returns, I will absolutely make an “I’m coming home” video in his honor with all the dramatic slow-motion clips and emotional music. In reality, though, we’ll sign players who will be terrible, like Nahshon Wright at cornerback, and act surprised when they can’t cover a soul.
The Suffering Never Ends
To put the cherry on top of this disaster sundae, the New York Football Jets will once again finish with fewer than four wins next season. Aaron Glenn, who somehow survived this dumpster fire of a season, will be fired after year two. General Manager Darren Mougey will remain in place to “search for a new head coach,” and then he’ll be fired the following year in some sort of delayed organizational incompetence domino effect.
And me? I’ll be stuck in hell for yet another complete cycle of the New York Football Jets. Fifteen years without a playoff appearance and counting. But hey, at least we’re consistent at being consistently terrible.
See you next January when we do this all over again.
Your pal,
#1 Jets Hater (for good reason) – Guyzo Frank
The Jets thought they were too good for Aaron Rodgers.
— Tommy Lugauer (@tommylugauer) January 5, 2026
So they fired him.
The Jets won 3 games.
Aaron Rodgers is going to the playoffs.
A place the Jets haven't been since 2011.
When Adam Schefter is basically laughing while reporting the Jets are keeping Aaron Glenn, you already know how bad this looks. What a joke. pic.twitter.com/qu1xG8YS0s
— Jake Asman (@JakeAsman) January 4, 2026
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